Recall Notice

Important Recall Notice

Regardless of make or year, all units known as "human beings" are being
recalled by the Manufacturer. This is due to a malfunction in the original
prototype units code named "Adam" and "Eve" resulting in the reproduction
of the same defect in all subsequent units. This defect is technically
termed, "Serious Internal Non-morality," but more commonly known as "SIN."

Some of the symptoms of the SIN defect:
[a] Loss of direction
[b] Lack of peace and joy
[c] Depression
[d] Foul vocal emissions
[e] Selfishness
[f] Ingratitude
[g] Fearfulness
[h] Rebellion
[i] Jealousy

The Manufacturer is providing factory authorized repair service free of
charge to correct the SIN defect. The Repair Technician, Jesus Christ, has
most generously offered to bear the entire burden of the staggering cost of
these repairs.

To repeat, there is no fee required. The number to call for repair in all
areas is: P-R-A-Y-E-R.

Once connected please upload the burden of SIN through the REPENTANCE
procedure. Next, download ATONEMENT from the Repair Technician, Christ,
into the heart component of the human unit.

No matter how big or small the SIN defect is, Christ will replace it with:

[a] Love
[b] Joy
[c] Peace
[d] Kindness
[e] Goodness
[f] Faithfulness
[g] Gentleness
[h] Patience<>[I] Self-control

Please see the operating manual, HOLY BIBLE, for further details on the use
of these fixes.

As an added upgrade, the Manufacturer has made available to all repaired
units a facility enabling direct monitoring and assistance from the
resident Maintenance Technician, the Holy Ghost. Repaired units need only
make Him welcome and He will take up residence on the premises.

WARNING: Continuing to operate a human being unit without corrections voids
the Manufacturer's warranty, exposing the unit to dangers and problems too
numerous to list, and will ultimately result in the human unit being
incinerated.


Thank you for your immediate attention.

Author: Anonymous